With my first labour I had no clue what I was doing and was happy to accept what I was asked of me, even allowing a Trainee Midwife to witness my birth (something I would not do now) and even allow my first child to be monitored via a Scalp Clip (a clip attached to your babies head to monitor them) even though there was, in hindsight, no distress or complication so no reason for it.
I had my limits though and when, having just given birth to my first child, my feet were put in stirrups to be stitched I started to say enough was enough. I asked how many were needed as I was needlephobic and unless they would stop my recovery I would not be having them and promptly started to untie the straps and buckles holding my ankles in place - I was 18 years old and scared.
A doctor was sent for to give a second opinion on my need for stitches at my request. After assessment I was told I needed only one stitch!! I was tied up and told I was 'being a baby' because I questioned my need for stitches!! I wouldn't just follow the rules and do whatever I was told without question even in that state.
I refused all intervention and removed my feet from the stirrups - this was the start of my rulebreaking in pregnancy and labour.
In my second labour I refused to accept being bullied and told what to do and decided to do it on my own territory! A home water birth was done at my request although I was told, in vivid detail on many occasions what could go wrong and made to feel I was doing something wrong, because I believe I had a choice and I was making sure I took it. Home births, where I lived at the time, were seen as rulebreakers and also it meant extra work for the Midwives and those on call - never mind! My home birth went as it should and I was happy and I even refused the injection to expel the afterbirth as again I felt this was just to make life easier and quicker whereas my body is more than able to do it on it's own. What did we do before drugs!!
My third pregnancy saw me again refuse the after birth injection and also, as with my second and fourth pregnancies, I also refused my baby having the Vitamin K injection and asked them to give it orally - simply my baby and my choice.
I think when we are in a vulnerable position, such as in labour, we think we don't have a voice or others know us better than we know ourselves and this is not the case a lot of the time. I am stubborn yes and I don't like being told what to do but many of the medical profession forget we are people, not numbers on a labour conveyor belt, and we have feeling s and thoughts on our and our babies care. As long as we are not endangering ourselves or others and there are no medical complications,we should have freedom to decide, break a few rules simply there to make others jobs easier, and not be afraid to ask for what WE want.
One Born Every Minute is on Wednesday nights from 4th Jan, 9pm, Channel 4 and available online at www.lifebegins.channel4.com
.
